We all know the scenario: The shared flat is breaking up. Maybe someone is moving to a different city, maybe someone finally wants to live alone, maybe it just isn't working anymore. And suddenly you're all facing the question: Who actually owns the sofa?
I've been through three shared flat dissolutions. Each was chaotic, but each one taught me something. Here's what I learned.
The Inventory Problem
In every shared flat, there are three categories of stuff: Things that clearly belong to someone. Things that someone brought at some point and nobody remembers who owns them anymore. And things that were bought together.
The first category is easy -- whoever brought it takes it or gives it away themselves. The other two categories become points of conflict if you're not careful.
My advice: Make a list early. Sit down together and walk through the flat. For each item: Who does this belong to? Who wants it? Nobody? Then it goes on the "to give away" list.
This conversation is sometimes uncomfortable, but it prevents bigger stress later. And it often brings surprising revelations -- maybe one person desperately wants to keep the lamp that everyone else thinks is ugly. Problem solved.
Jointly Purchased Items
This is the tricky part. Two years ago, you bought a sofa together, 300 francs, each person paid 100. Now someone wants to live alone and take the sofa. How do you work that out?
My experience: Forget the maths. Used furniture is worth almost nothing. The sofa you bought for 300 francs two years ago might fetch 50 if you're lucky.
The fairest way: Whoever wants it, gets it. If several people want it, draw lots or come to an agreement. If nobody wants it, give it away together.
Don't argue about money over used items. The emotional effort isn't worth the financial value.
The Time Pressure
Shared flat dissolutions usually have a deadline. The lease ends, the new flats are waiting. That means time pressure, and time pressure leads to bad decisions.
I once threw away a perfectly good bookshelf because on the last day nobody had time to collect it. That was stupid and unnecessary.
The better approach: Start early. As soon as it's clear the flat is dissolving -- even if that's two months away -- begin sorting things out. Post the first items online, test what works.
The earlier you start, the more options you have. And the less ends up in the skip at the end.
The Emotional Baggage
Dissolving a shared flat is rarely just about logistics. There are memories attached. The table where you had a hundred dinners together. The sofa where you watched films. The plant that somehow survived five years.
It's okay to feel that. But don't let the emotions block the decisions. The memories don't disappear just because the table goes.
Sometimes it helps to take a photo. Of the flat, of the room, of the things that are leaving. It sounds cheesy, but it makes letting go easier.
Practical Tips for the Dissolution
What worked during my shared flat dissolutions:
Create a shared PIKITUP account or take turns posting. That way nobody gets burdened with all the work alone. And you can decide together what gets posted when.
Coordinate the pickups. When several items are being collected on the same day, one of you is there and handles everything. That's more efficient than everyone arranging their own times.
For the last day: Build in a buffer. If you have to hand over the flat at noon, everything should be gone by 10. Not at 11:55.
And if something really is left over: Put it outside the door with a "Free" sign. In most cities this is tolerated, as long as it's usable items and not rubbish.
What Happens with the Rest
Sometimes stuff is left over that nobody wants and nobody collects. It happens.
For larger quantities: Call a second-hand shop. Most have a collection service. Caritas, the Salvation Army, local thrift shops -- someone usually takes it.
For electronic waste and broken items: Municipal collection points. This sometimes costs a bit, but it's the proper way.
And for the absolute worst case -- when a lot accumulates -- there are clearance services. Costs 500-1000 francs, but sometimes that's worth the peace of mind.
A Final Thought
Shared flat dissolutions are stressful, but they're also an opportunity. An opportunity to part with things that should have gone long ago. An opportunity to make other people happy. And an opportunity to start the next phase of life with less baggage.
Make the most of it. And if you post things on PIKITUP while you're at it, you're not only making life easier for yourselves, but for others too.
Got your own shared flat dissolution stories? I'm curious -- hello@pikitup.ch